Fewer calories? No, just a smaller size.

Seeing as it's the last day of the month, it is no surprise to anyone that I am totally broke as a joke. Earlier in the month I decided that it was important... no, necessary to purchase many items at Costco, including bottles of shampoo and conditioner that are so large that they should last me until I'm 80. My logic was that if I spend a lot of money but get a large quantity, I'll be saving money because I won't have to make the purchase again for a few months. That theory is all well and good until you run out of money! So now I have no money, but my hair looks great!!

Here's a picture of me and my shampoo bottle...

So because I'm broke, my diet has consisted of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and Lipton Cup-O-Soup. Today I decided to splurge and buy a bag of potato chips to accompany my sandwich and to help ward off starvation. Being a semi-health conscious girl, I opted for the bag of chips that advertised 40% less fat that a normal bag of chips, but with all the flavor of the full fat version. When I sat down to enjoy my crispy snacks, I realized why said potato chips have less fat: they just put fewer chips in the bag. I was literally amazed at how many chips WEREN'T in my bag!

And finally, yesterday was the annual Ben & Jerry's Free Cone Day! Because of the whole semi-health conscious thing, coupled with the fact that a scoop of ice cream at that place is $4, this is the one time of the year when I eat there. We took an office trip down the street to the parlor and waited in line for about 30 minutes for our free icy deliciousness. Unforch, right when we got up to the counter, they ran out of cones! So we had to settle for a cup, but it was still very yummy! Kat and I both got the cake batter flavor of ice cream, and we both quickly realized that "cake batter" is another name for "vanilla and chocolate swirl". But it was free so who am I to complain? I'd like to leave you with the image of Powla and Katie from Free Cone Day 2008.

Gone to the dogs.

This Saturday was the 10th annual Boardwaddle held in Ocean City, NJ. It features a basset hound "pawrade" to help raise money for homeless basset hounds. I went with Chris and Maggie, my 8-month old "niece". It was easily the cutest display of animals that I have ever seen in my whole life! The pictures are below, but let's back up to Friday. Friday featured the basset hound Olympics, which was hilarious. They had a "high jump" that started at 2 inches off the ground. Given the low clearance on (and stubborn nature of) a basset hound, there were some contestants who did not get past the 1st round. Some just walked right through the bar, knocking it over, and others could not jump over such a hurdle. The bar was raised up to 12 inches off the ground for the final round, but no bassets could clear it so it was moved down to 10 inches. The event was won by an 80-pound guy named Bo. He was being fed treats every time he cleared the pole, so I believe that is why he had the motivation to win!

And before I show you the photos of Saturday's pawrade, let me tell you about Friday night's dinner. Chris was nice enough to take me to dinner at Wolfgang Puck's American Grille in the Borgata. We were leaving the restaurant when who should we run into but old Wolfie himself!

What are the odds that the last two celebrity sightings I had were of men named Wolf? Crazy, right?? Well I was all ready to go over and give my compliments to the chef when I was told that we were leaving. Leaving. Leaving without taking one photo, getting one autograph, or even saying one 'Hello' to Mr. Puck. Apparently celebrity sightings are so commonplace to Chris that he is 100% totally unaffected. I was whisked out of the restaurant and told that I needed to act nonchalant and unimpressed. So for the rest of the evening I did what any normal person in my situation would have done: I pouted. Chris offered to go back to the restaurant so we could get a picture with Wolfgang, but I said no. I didn't want to seem chalant and impressed afterall. So dear readers, I was 2 feet from a world-renowned chef, but you will just have to take my word for it!

And now the pictures of the pawrade! The first photo of Maggie was taken on the way to the pawrade, and the last photo was taken on our way home. A two-mile walk with 400 basset hounds really tired her out! Here's hoping many homeless bassets will be provided for because of the pawrade!

I've kept you in suspense long enough.

Hello Dear Readers,
The story of my papal experience is a funny one, of course. After running around like a mad woman on Tuesday night (first stop: Dave and Hex's to get camera, take pictures with Remi and get an invite for dinner, followed by Tracy's to get Hokies camping chair, watch the end of the Biggest Loser, and tour her deck, followed by trip to Giant for provisions of peanut butter and jelly, Goldfish crackers, trail mix and bottled soda, then home to pack up and eat dinner) I finally felt prepared to see the pope. I set my alarm clock for 5:30am and fell asleep at 1:00am.

The morning came way too fast, but because I was CERTAIN that every person in the world was going to line the pope's route, I decided I had to forge on with my plan. My hair was mildly straight from the day before, and I didn't feel too dirty, so I decided not to take a shower so I could get downtown even faster and get an even better seat! I parked in Georgetown and started walking. The first person I encountered was Julie Carey, reporter for NBC 4 news, along with her camera crew.
Here's a rundown of how our conversation went:

Julie: (eyeing my camping chair and backpack) "Excuse me, are you headed to see the pope?"
Kim: "Yes. Yes I am."
J: "Oh that's great! I've been walking up and down Pennsylvania Avenue looking for people who have come early to get a good view, but no one's here yet. Since you're the first person I've seen, would you mind going over to our news truck to do an interview?"
K: "You mean nobody's here yet?"
J: "That's right. Can we do an interview?"
K: "Ummm ... did you walk all the way down to the White House?"
J: "I did. No one is here. Can we do that interview now?"

That's right, people. At 6:00am, I was officially the first person to secure my spot on the popemobile route. If that doesn't get me a ticket into heaven, I don't know what will! And let's not forget how I got 4 hours of sleep and didn't shower, so I had to conduct said interview looking like a half-dead, disheveled version of myself. Plus I was a little sweaty from the 50 pounds of gear I was hauling, so let's just say I'm more than glad that no one caught my interview when it aired later in the morning. If they had, I think I would have looked something like this...

So after my interview, I went to find the perfect popemobile viewing area. I settled in at the corner of 22nd and Pennsylvania. The time? 7:30am. This was the mob scene I had to fight to get my spot:

Needless to say, I was pretty bored for the first 3 hours of my journey. Luckily I had yet another reporter and camera crew come by to keep me company. On the ONE DAY that I don't shower and I'm sleepy and sweaty, not one but TWO people ask to interview me. A girl can go her whole life without being interviewed, but it happens to me twice in as many hours, and I look like a mess. This next reporter was from the Associated Press, and he asked me the same questions as the first reporter. I contemplated filling out a FAQ sheet and just handing it out to every reporter that requested an interview so I could save my voice for when the pope arrived, but I felt that would seem like I was trying to take attention away from pope ... but dare I say, for a few short hours, I was getting more press coverage than he was!

Eventually more people arrived and after a mere 6 hours, the popemobile passed me in about 6 seconds. But it was an amazing 6 seconds! As you'll see, I was joined by thousands of other papal well-wishers, as well as more police and secret service than I knew existed. Here are some photos of the event, and thank you to everyone who kept me company that day with their phone calls and texts! I'll put in a good word for you with the Big Guy Upstairs!

He's Heeeeere!

It's the moment every good little Catholic girl dreams about... the pope has come to town! While I did not get a ticket to the mass he's saying at the Nationals Stadium on Thursday (I put my name in my church's lotto but alas, the Lord had other plans for me.) I have mapped the route that the popemobile will be taking to get the pope around town.

My plan is to get up at around 5am tomorrow morning, armed with Dave's camera and Tracy's camping chair, go downtown to the corner of Pennsylvania Avenue and Rock Creek Park, and sit for 6 hours until the popemobile drives by. Having seen the pope when he came to St. Louis in 1999, my sister was able to offer me a bit of advice: stand on a corner so the popemobile has to turn in front of me, because despite its cumbersome size, that thing can pick up some serious speed on the straight-away. I'm not going to sit around for 6 hours to see a blur in white whiz by me at 45mph.

I'll have pictures to share (hopefully!) on Thursday. I'm fully expecting the whole thing to turn out like it did on The Golden Girls, when Sophia went to see the pope when he came to Miami, and when he was shaking her hand, his papal ring fell off into her hand. Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's going to happen to me. Wish me luck!

Why would you leave TV on for cat?

It's always difficult to get out of bed on a Monday morning, but today was unusually difficult. I slept with my window open, so at 4:17am I woke up to the sound of birds chirping. It was mildly relaxing, so I fell back asleep. Then at 6:00am I woke up to the sound of gunshots. Yes, gunshots. I listened for a minute while I decided whether or not I should call the cops (I mean, I live in Clarendon. People look at you funny if you are talking too loud on your cellphone, so gunshots are beyond rare.) and then I heard the shots again, then again. I finally figured out that the Old Guard boys across the street at Fort Myer were doing some kind of practice, maybe for a presentation for the Pope?? At any rate, I have a mind to go over there are complain about the 21-gun salute they chose to perform at 6am. Yes, Tracy, if I go over to complain, you can definitely come with me.

After I fell back asleep after the gunshot incident, I had one of my "I'm really good friends with a celebrity" dreams. I never dream that I'm dating or married to a celebrity, I just dream that I'm really, really good friends with them. In past dreams, I've done everything from trying to talk Courtney Cox out of getting a divorce, to playing footsie with Nick Lachey at a bed & breakfast we purchased together. In every dream, I remember thinking "Celebrities are just people. How come I'm not friends with more of them?"

So last night's dream was the MOTHER of all "I'm really good friends with a celebrity" dreams. In this dream, I was BFF with Mr. David Beckham!! He came to my office to pick me up and we just walked around the city together (although the city wasn't DC, it was Las Vegas). Occasionally people would come up to him and be like, "Oh my GOD! Can I get a picture with you??" and I would just stand off to the side, letting people take away from my time with David because, after all, we were best friends... I could hang out with him anytime.

Then we got into his Maserati and we were looking at houses that were for sale. He showed me a picture of one of the homes he wanted to buy and it looked like a castle. He said "Wouldn't it be amazing to live in a castle?" and for some reason my answer was, "You live in a place called Beckingham Palace! What more do you want?" and then I told him that "Beckingham Palace" was a "queer" name for a residence and we both got a good laugh about that. Then we exited the car and started to play "kick the can" with some kids on the street, then I had to go back to work because Brent was going to be upset that I was gone for so long! I didn't want to wake up! I just wanted to fall back asleep and continue my dream.

This weekend I met the cats I'm taking care of next weekend for my petsitting job. They were really sweet, and I can't wait to get started. This isn't a picture of the cat, but boy this is a cute picture, isn't it?

Woof! Woof!

I know, I know… I’m an awful blog-keeper. But with a life as exciting as mine, it’s hard to choose what to write about!!

Well, I guess the most exciting thing to write about is the fact that I got a second job! I’m working for a company called Fetch! PetCare, and I will be a dogwalker/petsitter. I am really excited about it because I love aminimals so much and since I can’t have any pets in my apartment (though my landlord made an exception for the roaches that infested my dirty neighbor’s apartment!) I thought this was a good way to interact with dogs and cats, plus I’ll get paid for it! It’s a national company and my boss is soooo sweet – I met her this weekend and we talked for a really long time, so I was really glad she offered my a position. I might even get to go on my first assignment next weekend! YAY!
And this job came along at the perfect time, because I was actually considering getting a robotic dog to keep me company. Before you say what a loser I am, just know that I’ve always lived with dogs or cats, and now that Adam’s doggie is gone I don’t even get to interact with dogs in the office anymore. But luckily for me, I won’t have to get a robotic dog and people won’t think I’m crazy.

I also had dinner with my dear friend Dave last night at a very swanky, upscale Arlington restaurant named … El Pollo Rico! It’s my favorite place to get a delicious bird.

And finally, I am very grateful to Dave and Hex for providing me with ample soil to help my tiny plants grow. Here they are, in all their glory. (the Pepsi can was added to show scale, so please don’t think I’m the kind of girl that sits around with soda cans laying around ... and without a coaster!! Uh-uh … not this girl!)

Hungry Like Wolf?

So there I was, walking back to the office after my usual morning Starbucks run, and who should I see walking towards me but none other than Mr. Wolf Blitzer!

He was carrying a briefcase and walking briskly to Starbucks. It's strange because when I got back to the office and spread the news of my celebrity sighting, Lori said that she saw him in Starbucks earlier in the morning. The man must really need his coffee! Also, she said that Wolf checked her out! So I'm going to be the first to start spreading a Wolf Blitzer infidelity rumor. Wolf hearts Lori!!

In unrealated news, I was approached last night by a giantic wild beast of a cat! Okay, it was just a housecat that must have been a mix of some very large breeds because she easily was 30 pounds. I started to pet her, then I went inside to set down my groceries and grab a can of cat food for her (while I do not have a cat, I keep cans of cat food because there are quite a few cats that roam the area around my apartment). I figured she would have already run off to chase birds or something, but when I came back outside, she was waiting by the door for me. I fell in love. She was declawed (I would never do that to a cat, but if I ever got a cat someone would have had to have them declawed first because my couch would make a good scratching post) and soooo sweet. I pet her for a while and then all of a sudden she darted off. So I guess we weren't meant to be. I can't have pets in my building anyway, but if I could, i definitely would have stolen this cat!